What Does God Expect From Us? Finding Freedom from Expectations

Do you ever feel weighed down by expectations? Do you ever wonder, “What does God expect from me?”

It may be the expectations you have of yourself, perhaps because of what your mother was like or your perception of what you should do. You may feel expectations from our culture and the media about what successful women need to get done every day, what you should look like and how much you should contribute. Or, perhaps you feel expectations from the church or your understanding of scripture.

There are a lot of shoulds out there when we look out for them. And we feel the weight of them. We have an expectation of how we should look, how skinny we should be, how much we should earn, and how clean our house should be. The shoulds can be overwhelming and discouraging. 

And yet, if you are like me, you want with all of your heart to please God. So how do we distinguish between the expectations of the world and the expectations of God? What does God really expect?

Here are a few key scriptures on expectations that can serve as guideposts to help us:

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. (Micah 6:8 NIV)

So often, we overcomplicate things. It is in our nature. But Micah reminds us to keep it simple. God has shown us what is good, so just do that. Act justly: don’t lie, cheat and steal. Don’t take advantage of people. Do the right thing. Love mercy: be kind and generous to those in need, forgive people who hurt you, give people the benefit of the doubt. And walk humbly with God: walk each day in relationship with your Saviour, in step with Jesus. Not to seek fame and fortune, but to bring glory and honour to Him.

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (Ephesians 2:10 NIV)

God had created each of us uniquely. He has given us gifts, talents, passions and dreams and He expects us to use them. Do the things only you can do. Only you can love your husband and raise your children if you have them, so make them a priority. Do the things that light you up, feed your passion and make the most of your strengths, because God is the one who gave them to you. Only you have your unique mix of gifts and passions, and we each need to take responsibility for becoming who God created us to be.

‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’ and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ (Luke 10:27 NIV)

The bottom line is always love. Love God, and love each other. Will striving for a promotion at work help you to love God more? Then go for it with all of your heart. If not, don’t feel obligated. Is volunteering to serve morning tea to the mother’s group at church an act of love for you? Then make it the very best morning tea you are capable of. But, if volunteering for the mother’s group makes you stressed and cranky when you get home to your family, then you are not loving the people only you can love, and it probably isn’t the right place for you. Use love as a filter. 

The times I am most weighed down by expectations are when I take my focus off my creator and spend too much time on social media or watching television. I see the ‘perfect’ (fake) homes and lives of others and feel discontented. I forget whose I am and try to impress people rather than simply pleasing God.

When I spend time in God’s word and in prayer, remembering the unique call God has placed on my life, the people He has given me to love and the gifts He has given me to use, the weight of expectation of the world around me lifts. I can live freely and lightly. I feel more like me, the person I’m created to be.

And, funnily enough, focusing on pleasing God rather than people makes me a kinder and more loving person, which makes me a kinder wife, mother and friend. I am a better person when I focus on pleasing God rather than pleasing other people.

If you feel weighed down by the expectations of the world around you and would like to discover who God created you to be, you might enjoy my Guided Journal, ‘Come to Me.’ It spends 4 weeks looking at passages from the Gospels, reminding us of what Jesus said and did, and our place as His followers, sitting at His feet. It is a great way to redirect our focus onto Jesus and reset our priorities.